Don’t praise me. I don’t like it.
You are praising me because you want something.
It puts pressure on me to perform. You praise me once, the next time I think I am expected to perform better.
Praise implies there is criticism on the other end. Praise can not be without criticism. They exist together.
Praise as criticism, is just words. They don’t mean anything.
Praise holds no value without criticism. You can not go on praising somebody without criticizing someone else.
I have read in a book, that says, it puts pressure on your kids if you praise them.
Once you know praise, you will want it more, or avoid not having it. It affects your sense of security.
It trains others to be dependent on me if I praise them. External measurement.
Don’t praise. Don’t criticize.
It is also a way for you to feel superior. Because you’re the evaluator of the value of another person. And if they listen to you, then you feel good. You feel good in giving validation because it makes you feel valued.
I had a friend – he didn’t die, we’re just not friends anymore, he loved to give others free advice. It was his way of feeling superior in knowledge. He liked people looking up to him.
Everyone wants to be a Guru these days, it seems.
One goes to a weekend seminar, or a couple of retreats, or performance workshops and then they become the experts and Gurus. Everyone is a life coach. Everyone wants to be a Guru.
This guy, from work, he is a colleague, has a habit of saying ‘Good Job’ to others. I cringe when I hear it. One day he said the same thing to me.
I said – ‘Thanks Daddy’. He was a bit taken back. May he ever utter those words to me again.