Fear of stupidity in meditation and relationships

We are afraid to be stupid or to appear to be stupid. Because of this, we are afraid to fail, and attempt things that can’t be well controlled.

We plan for failures.

We’re bringing the past failures and accounting for that in this planning, and that way repeating the same pattern. Planning is basically this. To re-create something already known, using the methods to avert past failures.

This fear of being seen as a failure, or stupid breeds the need to be seen intelligent.

Someone please listen to me!!! One screams.

Or make others listen to me at the extreme. And there begins this circus of having a voice and all.

Maybe you were mocked as a child and were not taken seriously by your friends, siblings, parents, and the people around you. We might have resolved to study, to gather more information to protect us from humiliation.

To never be called stupid again!

Be an accumulation of knowledge so we can explain certain things to others, to be respected as a well-read, knowledgeable person.

All this, a single movement of fear.

Can I bring in meditation now?

Because we are so used to this analytical thinking and having knowledge as the crutch to our identity, there is this feeling that one may become stupid in the absence of the incessant flow of repeating thoughts that lead you nowhere. These thoughts don’t lead you anywhere, in reality, they are just repeating the same pattern, but there is still the fear of losing that flow.

So there is this anxiety in seeing, because it may be a break from habit, to simply see something.

Conclusions about oneself cease when there are no thoughts, the identity-making ceases, and it is as if the perception of something is very simple. And we don’t like that simplicity either. Because we are taught to struggle and compete in order to be somewhere and to be someone. I think this blocks our ability to see things for what they are beyond our opinions and biases. And being able to listen to what is.

This interrupts our daily life, perverts our relationships because we’re in our heads.

Fear of being nothing. Can we face that?

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