May be religion has something to do with it. Do the right thing and then you will go to heaven. I am not a religious person though. So why. To be a good person. To be loved. Do the right thing so I will be loved. And if they don’t it is their loss. To give me a sense of personal importance that others fail to recognise.
The underdog feeling. Only I know that I am great, anyone who fails to recognize it is a fool.
May be. Or may it be the sheer unwillingness to change. That I have accepted the fate that I was born into a certain condition and there is nothing that I can do about it. I am doubting the validity of that premise. Because, you know, I am not sure.
I want to change – at the same time I believe change is not possible. There is no free will. I literally can’t choose what I am going to think the next moment. How can I plan my entire life, if I am at the mercy of my knowledge and memories?