Browsing Category Coaching

Striving to be better creates a sense of insufficiency

Comparison causes hurt We want to make something out of our lives. Because we feel, right now, our lives aren’t very meaningful. We feel insufficient. What creates this sense of insufficiency? I think it is what we’re taught to think in terms of insufficiency. We’ve compared ourselves to others constantly right from our early childhood. This comparison causes hurt. When a parent compares the older…

Read More

Why do relationships fail? What blocks forming relationships?

Follow my blog with Bloglovin Are we conditioned to lie? Now I know that may seem to be a jump from the question ‘why do relationships fail’ but bear with me. We have a lot of automatic responses. A result of habit, picked up as far as back from our childhood. Saying the right things, the socially acceptable thing. Even simple things like saying, thank…

Read More

Fear of hurt in relationships

Who gets rejected? Who is rejecting? I am afraid of being humiliated, maybe that’s because of one’s childhood. Strict parents etc. The reason does not matter. Knowing the reasons for problems hasn’t solved the problems. I read a book, read something about the psychology of the problem, then I say ‘oh that must be it’. Then I go on to tell someone else, or even…

Read More

Praise

Don’t praise me. I don’t like it. You are praising me because you want something. It puts pressure on me to perform. You praise me once, the next time I think I am expected to perform better. Praise implies there is criticism on the other end. Praise can not be without criticism. They exist together. Praise as criticism, is just words. They don’t mean anything….

Read More

don’t try

Trying, effort, means distortion. Trying is always a reaction. The motivation is to get away or to get towards. It creates a lot of struggle and turmoil. And you miss the point. Trying to be kind is not kindness, trying to be courageous is not courage, trying, to be honest, is not honesty. These are struggles violence, fear, and dishonesty. Such a movement gives you…

Read More

Doing nothing

Set an intention – the spiritual teacher said. It is all about intention. Set your intentions before meditation. that’s when you have to seriously question, whether the so-called spiritual teacher knows anything about meditation. I know something about meditation. And it is not that. The intention is a product of thought. And meditation is anything but thought. Intention creates effort. Because it sets an expectation….

Read More

Continuity

Death is a stop to continuity. Physically, the organism dies. Why are we frightened of this ending of continuity? We as we know it cease to exist. The memory of who I am, cease to exist. We will be nothing. The possibility of ending of the sense of self causes anxiety. My job is continuous, at least we think it is continuous, the possibility of…

Read More